Peaceful Moments - Part Two - Believe

Part Two in this series by Jan McDaniel

Believe

​Belief is not proof. Holding on to an idea even though you can’t prove it or don’t feel it at the time requires faith. What made me believe in life again – a life worth living – was both belief and faith.

What was happening at the time or just before the time of a person’s suicide is not the reason it happened. It is the easiest thing to see, to blame, but the often invisible web of brain chemistry, personality, learned experiences, history, medications, illnesses and injuries, addictions, various kinds of stress, coping strategies or lack thereof, impulsivity and a myriad of other factors come together in ways that make a person lose hope, lose the will to live, and lose the ability to think rationally.

Later, as we try to dissect the suicide, we are still trying to follow a rational thread to untangle what happened, what caused the suicide, what could have been done to prevent it and to help our loved one heal. We struggle to comprehend these things as if finding the answers to those unanswerable questions could end our suffering and bring someone back to life. Sometimes this happens after other types of death, too.

Because suicide seems to go against our innate survival instincts, we can’t follow the reasoning of the one who died. We come to a blank spot where things happened that we can’t piece together in a rational way – and then there is the suicide. No pattern or puzzle was ever so difficult to solve.

That is where logic breaks down and belief and faith take over. To fill that gap, that blank spot – to fill it with something we understand – we must abandon human reason and accept the unknown. In the same way, we accept the truth that we can survive. Belief is something you feel may be the truth. You choose to believe or not.

Faith is the next step. Faith is putting trust in someone or something. Acceptance. Belief. Faith. 


Today's Journal Prompt

What is one thing you believe that can help you heal?  Are you willing to put your faith there? How does that make you feel?
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