It's Okay Not to Be Okay

artwork and post by Ari

After losing a beloved someone, we struggle with moving away from the sadness. Our family and friends are supportive and kind in the beginning, and then they reach a point where they want us to be ok, to enter back into life, to be “happy”. Sometimes they push us to go out, to do things that we would have enjoyed before. They mean well but they cannot understand.

Our hearts and our minds yearn for someone that is not here to enjoy those same things with us; they never will be again, and although we have others that we love around us, that one beloved person is all we want.

This will change over time, your feelings will soften, your days will again begin to be a little brighter. New memories will be made, without them, and new moments of joy will come ... eventually. But there is no rush to get to this point. It is ok to not be ok for a while.

In my beginning after losing my boy, I stayed in bed for the first two Mother's Days. I have other children, but I only wanted the one. I think they understood, but it's fine if they didn't. You need to take care of you, your feelings are valid. If all you want is to stay in bed, then stay in bed! You will get up and join them eventually; life does go on, but remember ... It's ok to not be ok.

Hugs and prayers to all who are reading this, be well.
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