by Jan McDaniel
There are so many things, large and small, that call for our attention. The same is true about our grieving. There are many things to mourn. Even after the initial mourning period and when active grieving has passed, small moments can find those tender places in our hearts and bring the pain there to the surface.
One day years ago, while cleaning out my closet, I found a wooden box filled with bits and pieces of my husband’s childhood. Small toys, sticks and rocks, a couple of marbles, stuff a little boy would treasure. My thoughts went like this: How could he leave these? He kept them all those years. How could he leave these … and his books … and us?
When you feel like you have walked off the edge of the earth as if it is flat, after all, find an anchor. Connect with someone who understands. In later years, it will be easier to find your footing again when these things happen, believe it or not. At that time, you are ready for more than just enduring and just doing the things that need to be done. You will be ready to return to life.
If you have done everything you can but still feel hopeless, keep walking. Keep trying. You will never know how far you can go unless you do. Reach out to someone new. Research support groups, local and online.
Flip the situation. Volunteer. Do something nice for someone else. When you are thinking of them, your mind cannot dwell on your own troubles.
Talk to God. Then wait. Listen. It is in those quietest moments that you will feel a nudge in the right direction.
We are all connected. We are all pieces of each other. It is when we abandon what we think we want – what’s not working – and surrender to being led, that we find we are part of a greater wholeness. At that time, we begin to work the puzzle of life. There is a place for you there.
And if you need connection after losing a loved one, there are places for you with people who care, no matter how long it has been since your loss. Click on "Support" at the top of this page to find some.
Way for Hope
Losing someone you love is difficult, but it can mean a lot to hear from others traveling similar paths.
Links of Value:
Alliance of Hope for Suicide Loss Survivors
National Alliance on Mental Illness
Word of God
"My Story" Big Daddy Weave
"Hope in Front of Me"
The Joy FM
Traumatic loss or preexisting conditions can worsen mental health. Use this info graphic to find help.
"Take Charge of Your Mental Health" - a free download from www.nami.org: