by Jan McDaniel
If you are having a difficult time communicating with family and friends about your loss and your needs, you are not alone. This is a fairly common concern in the aftermath of loss, especially after deaths where violence or other traumatic circumstances were involved. Perhaps you are not even sure yourself what you need right now.
Everyone grieves differently, and those around you may not understand what you are going through. They may want you to "get back to normal," or they may even blame you for the death of your loved one.
Even if they want to help, they may not know how. This includes friends, family members, and coworkers ... anyone with whom you come in contact.
When conversation is not easy, download and print the Understanding Cards below. Card-stock works best.
Give the cards to others. You may want to use these or similar words in an email or letter, if that is more comfortable. If you can, letting others know what you feel can sometimes help calm the situation or bring about the healing you seek in these relationships.
Ask for the help you need. It may be actual help with chores or childcare, space to grieve, or other things. These needs will change over time. Don't hesitate to speak, and let others know you care about their healing, too.
Download Understanding Cards.
Way for Hope
Losing someone you love is difficult, but it can mean a lot to hear from others traveling similar paths.
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Links of Value:
Alliance of Hope for Suicide Loss Survivors
National Alliance on Mental Illness
Word of God
"My Story" Big Daddy Weave
"Hope in Front of Me"
The Joy FM
Traumatic loss or preexisting conditions can worsen mental health. Use this info graphic to find help.
"Take Charge of Your Mental Health" - a free download from www.nami.org: